A Broken Outlaw (Belles & Bullets Book 7) by Caylen McQueen

Author:Caylen McQueen [McQueen, Caylen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2017-11-07T00:00:00+00:00

Eighteen

Julian and Nicky spent the rest of the night together, drifting from saloon to saloon, where they sipped shots and serenaded each other. As they stumbled away from their sixth saloon, Julian warbled, “They call him Nicky Gunnnnn... he seems like lots of funnnnnn... I really like his, uh... his bunnnns.”

“You like my buns?” Nicky cackled with laughter as he burst through the saloon's double doors and staggered onto the street. As intoxicated as they were, they could barely walk, but they somehow managed to hold each other up.

“I liiike hiiiiiiiiiiiiis buuuuuunnnnns!” Julian bellowed at the top of his lungs, which made Nicky laugh so hard, he had tears in his eyes.

“Go go go go go!” Nicky exclaimed as he pushed Julian in the direction of an accessory shop. As they stumbled into the shop together, laughing and whooping, the stern shopkeeper glared in their direction. He assumed they were there to cause trouble.

“Look, Babydoll!” Nicky stopped at one of the racks and picked up a red leather eye patch. As he slipped it over Julian's good eye, he roared with laughter.

“Did you just call me Babydoll?” Julian tried to suppress his chuckles, but hysteria overcame him, and he exploded in a fit of giggles. He was too drunk to care that both of his eyes were covered by eye patches, leaving him unable to see anything.

“I think I did. And you should call me, uhhh... Booboo.”

“I like Booboo.”

“I like you-you,” Nicky declared. He picked up a fake mustache, pipe and newsboy hat, then he decorated Julian's face with all three items. “You look like... P-P-P...” Inebriated Nicky thought it was so hilarious, he couldn't get the words out. Finally, he sputtered, “Professor Patches!”

“I don't want two patches!” Julian whined. “I don't wanna be Professor Patches!”

“Fine!” Nicky removed Julian's red eye patch and haphazardly tossed it on a shelf. “How'd you lose your eye, anyway?”

“A lunatic took it.” Julian stumbled away from Nicky and went to look at some wigs.

“Where'd he take it?” Nicky asked, but he didn't get an answer from Julian, who was too entranced by wigs on a rack to pay attention to his friend.

“I like redheads,” Julian whispered as he petted a curly red wig. “I've always had a weakness for them. Always. Always... hic!”

Nicky tittered with laughter at the sound of Julian's hiccup. Then he picked up Julian's favorite red wig and plopped it on his head. “How do you like me now, Babydoll?”

“Youuuuu look gorgeous, Booboo,” Julian's lazy tongue and liquor-addled brain made the words come out slowly. “If I was a man, I'd deffffinitely have sex with you.”

Nicky scratched his head in drunken bewilderment. “Waaaait... you're not a man?”

“Ohhh yeah.” Julian suddenly looked enlightened. “I guess I am!”

To the shopkeeper's surprise, Julian paid for the wig, the hat, the pipe and the mustache, and then Nicky and Julian returned to the outside world.

“I love you, Nicky Gunn!” Julian declared to the heavens. “I love love love you, dammit!”

“I love you too, man!” Nicky, who was much taller than Julian, swept him off his feet and spun him around in circles.

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